Ilana Estelle

Ilana was born with a disability she didn’t know she had until the age of 46, when something her mum said caused her to look further into her disability and sight of her medical notes revealed that she had been diagnosed with cerebral palsy at the age of 2. That discovery turned out to be a unique and life-changing experience that has forced Ilana to stand back and look at her life’s experiences differently. On receipt of her diagnosis, Ilana set up her website, The CP Diary and uses her experiences to explore her emotional and physical health, with an inspiring message advocating positivity, resilience and change. Ilana likes to spend her days writing and blogging about anything that contributes to her health and wellbeing. She is an animal advocate and is passionate about environmental issues. When she is not writing or tending to her blog, Ilana enjoys days out exploring the Yorkshire countryside. Ilana lives with her husband in Yorkshire. Her grown up son and daughter both live in London.

Articles:

Space to Heal: Finding Meaning after Loss

Coping with the death of my twin has been an incredibly challenging and personal experience. Finding meaning and purpose in the aftermath has and continues to be a deeply personal journey. My writing helps. I offer these suggestions for individuals as they navigate their own loss. Give yourself space to heal It is important to give yourself permission to grieve in your way and at your own pace. By allowing yourself the space to heal, you can gradually find meaning and purpose as you move forward on your journey of healing and self-discovery. When it comes to exploring new passions […]

When Grief Causes Mental Health Problems

Grief support and mental health are deeply interconnected aspects of wellbeing. Grief is a natural response to loss, whether it’s the death of losing someone close, the end of a relationship, or any significant change or loss in one’s life. It is essential to recognise that there is no right or wrong to grieve and that grieving is a highly individual process. It is different for each of us. Prolonged or Intense Grief Prolonged or intense grief can impact mental health significantly. It can also lead to symptoms of depression, anxiety, or post-traumatic stress disorder (“PTSD”) in some cases. Seeking […]

Soul and Grief Connection

The soul and grief are deeply intertwined in many spiritual and philosophical traditions. It’s only natural that after someone dies, those they leave behind will start to question and want to find meaning. Grief can lead individuals to ask questions, prompting them to think about the nature of existence and the soul’s relationship with the material world. This journey, though difficult, can lead to profound insights and philosophical and spiritual growth, reshaping our understanding of life and death. BELIEVING IN THE AFTERLIFE Believing in the afterlife can offer immense comfort to those grieving, providing a sense of continuation beyond physical […]

Writing through Grief

I write about grief to help me through the ‘grieving process’ after the loss of my twin. I hope it helps you too. Grief is complex; it’s based around individual experiences that people go through in response to loss. WRITING HELPS ME Writing helps me through the grieving process after the loss of my twin. It allows me to express how I feel, myself. The act of putting thoughts into words, I find is cathartic and healing. GRIEF IS NOT LINEAR It is important to be aware that grief is not a linear process. It does not have a defined […]

Grief Can Transform the Future

Grief can throw a spanner in the works, but it can also bring acceptance and closure positively, so long as we’re honest with ourselves. Our experiences can distort our perception of the past. It can feel like our memories are no longer reliable, as grief colours everything with its darkness. A SPANNER IN THE WORKS A spanner may throw our past into the works because the past isn’t always kind, so we alter how we perceive it. Loss can stop us in our tracks, and it can make us question the value and meaning of our experiences. Grief can make […]

A Spiritual and Healing Journey

Spirituality and healing around grief is inevitably an individual and personal journey, with no two people sharing the same experiences. While my interest in spirituality started in childhood, my spiritual and healing journey started in earnest some 13+ years ago when I set up my website, The CP Diary, following my Cerebral Palsy diagnosis, aged 46. Personal reflections capture the essence of spirituality and healing. It also highlights the personal nature of spirituality and its potential to accommodate healing on multiple levels—including the physical, emotional and spiritual level. It involves connecting with our inner-selves and being in tune with the […]

Emotional Responses to Grief

Grief is a highly individual and complex emotional experience that manifests differently in each of us. People may express their grief through a variety of emotions and behaviours. Some common ways grief can manifest include: SADNESS AND TEARFULNESS Grief can often involve a deep sense of sadness with memories that can leave many people tearful. ANGER AND GUILT People can often feel angry at their situation, at themselves around their loss. Through grief, they may also direct their anger at others. Guilt around loss can be something individuals grapple with. Some individuals may also feel remorse, questioning if they should […]

Grief’s Impact on Family Unity

Grief and the grieving process are deeply personal and complex experiences that can have different effects on us. It’s true that shared experiences of loss can create a sense of empathy and understanding among people, but the impact of grief on relationships can vary. While grief can bring people together, it can also split families. SHARED PAIN Shared pain can foster a sense of solidarity, support, and compassion and people may find comfort in connecting with others who have perhaps gone through similar experiences, and this shared understanding can lead to stronger bonds. However, it is important to recognise that […]

Understanding and Working through Grief

Understanding and working through grief isn’t without its challenges. Although you may have weeks or months to prepare, knowing you’re going to lose a loved one. It isn’t something you’re always ready for and that’s okay. GRIEF AFFECTS US ALL DIFFERENTLY Grief affects us all differently and there is no timescale for working through grief. Fortunately, many of us will come through grief with a better understanding of how we feel. Initially, we may wander and get lost for a while, and that’s okay too, or we may wait until we’re feeling mentally ready to accept that we need to […]

Grief is Complicated

Grief is complicated, it takes time to work through. Losing someone isn’t something you just tell yourself you’re okay with, it’s more complex than that. It’s also not something that should be ignored. Unravelling issues and working through relationships, takes time. Grief is also complex and intertwined, it takes time to adjust. The Workings of the Mind We may never come to understand the workings of the mind, because it is complex. What we all think can differ, but what makes it even more complicated, is the experiences we carry and how we will view the world, through those experiences. […]

Open to Hope is an online community offering inspirational stories of loss, hope and recovery. We believe hope is the bridge between loss and recovery.